Monday, August 28, 2006

On Hiatus

Due to certain reasons, i need to be away. destress, emo-laxing and mainly escapism.
How long? duno..

depends on how the situation unfolds.

i create hope, who took away?
i wish, who doesnt wish?
i give, who don feel?
i sacrifice, who enjoy?
i weep, who laugh?

self-willingness expects nth in return. yet, a feeling of dejection? why?

Posted by wanderluster at 8/28/2006 12:16:00 AM

Sunday, August 27, 2006

i waited for a person for a night...again

didnt sleep a wink..

its almost daylight soon...

as if the person will be touched..

nah...

this is self willingness

A test on my patience

6 + 6 = 12 hrs...

not bad.. half a day,

but i cant hold on any further...

so pls.. see that corner over there?

i m gona die on the spot..

Posted by wanderluster at 8/27/2006 04:04:00 AM

Saturday, August 26, 2006

An echo fades into the night,

an eerie mournful sound.

A shooting star disappears from sight,

and I crumble to the ground.

There is no life within this garden;

my sobs are the only sound.

I have poisoned the honeyed fountain

where your love and passion could be found.

I stare at the stars above,
my grieving howls always fill the night
I remember how it used to be when we shared our fears and delights.
You are a treasured friend to me.
How can I make things right?

Feeling afraid, cold and lonely,
I long to tell someone how I feel,
but no one want to hear mi.
The old wounds show symptoms of reappearance
The pain for you is much too real.
Should I back away and build a wall and block away how I feel?
Yes i should..

Delta Goodrem - Lost Without You (World Music Awards 2005)

*emo + stressed + confused* mode...

no use being emo too.. which i have been doing all the time..

Posted by wanderluster at 8/26/2006 03:24:00 PM

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

OK OK OK! wait!!! don divert your attention to other blog or other things!

i know joakim (left) really sux... cant really sing to save his own life.. blah blah blah.. i noe u all wan him out..haha

but i find that he is quite pretty amazing..able to survive in the top 6 of sing idol. really commendable..

to be honest, if i put myself in his shoes, i may probably pick the highest building in singapore and jump off from there.. imagine 75% of singaporeans bombarded you with so much negative comments , criticism, slammings, i bet u wun be able to take that blow.. i watched the sing idol today and ken lim said "SHHH! can i have some moments of silence? ok joakim.. i think this quietness is better than the noise that comes out from your mouth." wow! pretty insulting huh?
and i heard one voice in the tv "BU HAO TING"..omg.. imgaine u are singing and ppl say its nt nice....here again, another blow for him to take on...i bet he will crying afterwards... haha

i watched him sing like a monkey.. nice face but too bad.. vocal cannot make it! EVEN I CAN SING BETTER THAN HIM! haha.. he is really not my singapore idol but.. he is my role model, another form of idol.. i think his "hack care wad others said" attitude is actually wad i really admire.. and he still can continue to bring his "passion" on stage despite his cmi vocal.. i honestly admit that i don have such qualities.. i take in negative comments/seriously.. some ppl may say "sticks and stones would hurt them but not words", i m like the opposite..

from last mth to this mth, i received like ger-zillions insults from friends/classmates...and family? i don actually have to care...jus like joakim.. being able to put aside all the shameless comments directed at him.. that is really one thing i have to praise him.. (not his singing of cos lah! lolz..) and one thing i have to learn from him . btw, oh well, tats abt it..tadah!

i love walkin in the rain.. cos nobody will know i m crying..

Is he really that cute? judge it urself..

Posted by wanderluster at 8/23/2006 09:39:00 PM

Monday, August 21, 2006

Jessica Simpson - A Public Affair

Video of the day!! i like this song..quite cute.. but the MV abit..er..? bimbo? hot? haha..dunno

TIME TO BLOCK! oops... blog ..haha..

today p.e was so fun lah... i cant believe i score a pt. for the rugby game...lolz. nobody tagged mi! haha..and i jus run past the people at amazing speed.. woots! goal! i nv so actively partcipate in PE b4 lah...lolz.. so i jus pia and do my best..lolz.. well.. tats was fun for the morning part. then it came to the lecture part...lolz.. omg.. totally can sleep... cos the lecturer was SO BORING! totally wanna sleep... BUT! omg... miraculously i didnt sleep! haha.. listening to lecture..

today was jus normal and pleasant day...lolz.. i meet up my pri cum sec cum jc friend, ray.. kaoz.. like wait for him for like 3h 15 mins in the afternoon? but i didnt actually waste my time lar.. mug for 3 h 15 mins lor.. then we go secret recipe and study until 9pm..eat the cheese cake there also..haha..mice.. thanks to him, i managed to clear some chemisty doubts.. wa.. organic chem is really irritating.. so many things to memorise.. and wed is chemistry lecture test liao...i jus dun wanna flunk it... jus wanna score a decent marks for it. that will be good..lolz

well..today is quite a rewarding day.. nv wasted my time..lolz.. now i damm tired sia.. trying to type this blog... but somehow no fans leh! omg...haha... ppl! pls tag! haha... i m so thick-skin..

these few days i try not to tok to one of my friend who is having exams..lolz.. this is not dao but jus wanna give him full concentration to mug..haha ..Muahahah.. see how considerate i m..lolz.. actually i jus scared that i will say sth that may suddenly affect his mood..lolz..cos i always tok crap/rubbish..or sth which is unpleasant to his ears.. words don get processed by the brain before leaving my mouth ..so better play safe.. let him have some peaceful and quiet moment and 100% concentration for his exams.. really hope he will obtain his GPA 3.5 or 3.7.. lolz.. will definitely pray hard for him.

Posted by wanderluster at 8/21/2006 11:45:00 PM

Saturday, August 19, 2006

haha.. today my computer power unit short-circuit... totally saw it explode..lolz. i have to carry it to the repair shop to repair.. kaoz.. spent my $35 bucks...on the power box.. xianz.. totally moneyless. the man at the computer shop tell mi to be mentally prepared cos if the sparks created from the short-circuit thingy got damaged the motherboard..i can buy a new computer liao..lolz. lucky...it nv happen.. actually all is my fault.. i on the computer and went to sleep..yesterday haha!

today was jus a normal day.. have cca in the morning. everyone was so xianz xianz.. and of cos the "xianz virus" had spread to mi too. very lazy sia... i try blowing the flute in the cca room..haha.. almost fainted.. totally out of breath. cant believe ppl can hold their breath for so long. haha..

aniwae.. my brother brought his "fat" gf to home.. wa kao...she wear the low low skirt and jean...omg.. totally er...haha... duno how to describe. u noe... those figures like buffalos, legs like tree trunks..haha! omg..i m so evil..btw.. i shouldnt judge ppl so much.. lolz..its wrong aniwae. but i always have this habit.. haha can say is gifted. i think that only thru others ppls' comments and criticisms, one will then improves its appearance or watever things. its all right to criticise but it wrong to insult. criticise and insults are really two diff things.

aiya..actually today not much to blog.. gona start mugging 2mr le.. cos others have long time started le..lolz.. wun lose to them de! haha.. ok

Posted by wanderluster at 8/19/2006 10:28:00 PM

Thursday, August 17, 2006

I am sorry...

today...i felt really very bad. i have made my most trusted friend really ultra angry.. there is really no pt having deep grudges abt my sad life or wad.. i have ultimately disappoint my friend who not onli almost everyday console/cheer mi up keep mi acompany for many mths and days... i can really sense that he hates mi...for the reason that i irritated him with lots of complains abt my life and scarastic remarks abt stuffs around mi.. it seems that i treated him like a person which i can vent my anger on.. of cos he got sick and tired of my complains... i have really crossed his tolerance levl today..and made him real angry.. i m such a bastard.. supposedly to be only my problems but it jus affect others.. why should ppl care abt mi when i don even cherish the things or friends that is around mi -

"u can onli be happy when u wan to be happy" - thats wat my teacher say b4... as for mi...i realised my repeated complains abt life wun help at all.. it jus makes mi more sad.. honestly i hardly make any effort to make myself happy.. the greatest change in mi which i regret the most is actually my pessimistic character... really no more.. i will revert it to optimism no matter wad...

i sincerely apologised to my that friend... i hope u wun hate mi becos of what has happened.. its ok if u cant forgive mi.. i will be also ultra angry if i put myself in ur shoes..

i m really sorry..

Posted by wanderluster at 8/17/2006 11:29:00 PM

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

insults

today.. alot of ppl insulted mi.. inculding one of my best fren, patel.. quite disappointing... my mood dampen down so much.. i dun wish to tok abt the insults.. too sensitive.. i m now so tired -mentally and physically. if u guys feel like insulting mi again... Get lost! - as far as possible. i don wish to hear anything. i m really really tired...

ppl... if u see mi having a good time/life.. u are wrong! i m really very vexed... everyday i have to worry for many things.. honestly i still haven recover from my set-backs.. still trying very hard.. trying to forget the sad things in the past... everyday i try to look happy..as if nth has happen..but inside mi... i felt very troubled.. i wish time can heal.. i wish it will be erased from my memory... actually, i should concentrating on my studies..but i keep on distract myself with other things..sounds stupid isnt it?

i feel awful.. i cant say out wat i wan..and i don really deserve wat i wan....

Posted by wanderluster at 8/16/2006 11:44:00 PM

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Christina Aguilera - Ain´t No Other Man

video of the day!

Posted by wanderluster at 8/15/2006 12:26:00 AM

Monday, August 14, 2006

today was my unlucky day... i lost my fav *limited edition* loy fatt p.e. t shirt on the way home cos i hang it beside my bag...it dropped.. had to go back the long way to the bus stop to find it.. damm pissed and tiring.. (carrying my heavy bag in the process to and fro) i managed to find it at the bridge where i used to walk on..spent like 35 mins finding it..damm it...

in the morning, miss huang -my ct.. keep saying our class did very badly...quite true lar.. and quite unlucky too... most of my classmates 's parent have to see the subject heads on the meet-the-parent-session... damm suay.. some even nid to see the principal cos they did ultra badly.. damm unlucky sia.. actually i find wat my teacher said was true... "when u really wan something, u will definitely make/find/create time for it..." this theory applies to lots of things.. (like lets say if i m busy.. but i wish to watch stephanie sun concert..i will heck care no matter wad find time for it..) alot of my friends when asked to do sth keep saying "no time! where got time... " then in the end..they end up sleeping at home or caught doing meaningless stuff..from my experiences, tell them also no use.. they will still heck unless they really wan to do it. so no pt forcing though sometimes u may wan them to be enthu in something...

u can say that i m stupid... for i sometimes listen to my friends and help them in all ways... which i can actually heck care and jus bother my own business.. why? its all jus abt the attitude in treating others.. i believe if i treat other good one day...the other will treat mi good also..( ...although it is like so seldomly happened...alot of ppl treat mi like shit! wa kaoz...) i hate ppl who made use of mi... do this do that..and jus say a "thank you goodbye" thats it! i somehow can sense the other person..trying to think that "haha! seng yong is so stupid... do so much"..totally insincere and not show any appreaciation...

then when i try to heck one time... ppl will say things like A "ok fine! u good... treat mi like tat rite! i pay u double next time..." totally took mi for granted.. as if it is compulsory for mi to help them do things like dat.. instead of saying B "nvm, its ok..i try to find other ppl's help" most if the time .. A is actually what i hear most from others... as for B.. i don even remember when is the last time ppl can actually say that..

crap lar.. life screwed up... nid to screwed it back down...

Posted by wanderluster at 8/14/2006 11:42:00 PM

Sunday, August 13, 2006

great! i m back.. this time i wun abandon my blog again.... really. after lots of (to the power of infinity) things has happened, it really took mi quite alot of time to settle down... the period of pain, anguish, anger, craziness and sianness will be soon over.. sometimes i m jus abit bored, lazy to entertain myself.. instead, i go and irritate ppl.. tats y these few mths down with super bad luck (bad karma sia).. i dun wan to list out all the bad stuff that happened cos i think it gonna filled up the whole page... haha

i love to say life's a bitch.. cos it never turn to be as wonderful as i think. lolz.. suan le.. no pt complaining . time to blog real stuff.

hmm..what did i do today?

omg..nothing...

haha.. eat, sleep, watch tv

aniwae, today my brother brought a new gf to home...damm fat.. i wonder what happen to the ex.. i think he is really a b******.. i tok to the "ex"-gf...and she doesnt even know anything abt the new gal and say she was still in a relationship with my bro.. obviously..my brother was playing with her.. really too much.. but for these kind of things..i rather not to blurt out anything... too hurtful... soon..she duno anything and gonna be dumped soon or later.. quite sad.. i find her character quite not bad. although she maybe not nice-looking but overall, i think she is better quality than my bro.. haiz... being dumped is not nice after all..lolz... especially after one has done alot on the other.. few days ago...i went shopping with farhan, jialin and gang. i saw this couple.......omg.. suddenly felt so jealous.....extremely jealously.. both so nice-looking and somemore so intimate.

my second brother once told mi that he is gona find another partner who is uglier than himself. why? do you think if u have better quality than others, u have more chances to dump others and less chances to get dumped? actually if u think carefully..its quite logically.. the other partner may like you more and it will incurred more losses if he/she dump you. this is called "deterence"...haha...learnt from social studies. is to let the other partner think twice before going thru a break...as a result it will maintain a form of loyalty.. for example..like "will i find a better looking gf/bf in future if i dump him or her?" it may be agrued that character is the most important thing to look for in the partner.. but afterall ..appearance is always more appealing and make up the most impression. tats y we see on the road alot of pretty gf with ugly bf, vice versa.

haha...actually i m toking crap..lolz... its up to you to think abt it. well..tadah! blog finished. blog more next time!

pics of the day!